Hola, hola Life Lover crew! I hope that everyone is enjoying (or at least trying) to enjoy the change of season. Over here, I’m trying to find the joy in the cold weather, lots of blankets, tea, and movies. Sometimes I wish I was a kid again to not feel cold, or at least be having fun playing outside with my friends, never thinking about how cold it was ( POV: I’m from Punta Arenas, one of the coldest cities in Chile) and that thought made me realise that maybe my inner child was needing a bit of love. So, that is what I am sharing with you this month: the importance of playing and embracing our inner child and why this should be on everyone’s bucket list. And, of course, a few tips on how to spoil our inner child at least once a month.
By Pat
First, what is an inner child? This is a psychological term used to describe the connection that we have within ourselves to our child self and our childhood memories. It is the part of our subconscious that has been picking memories, emotions, and beliefs from the past, as well as our hopes and dreams for the future.
Sometimes we find that certain behaviours or emotions mimic the ones that we have experienced as child, sometimes we don’t even understand why we react a certain way, but we might have experienced something similar in our childhood and that is where we learned this behaviour. All that we experienced from our early years until puberty is part of our inner child, and that we couldn’t process everything, we just learn, absorb information, and repeat.
According to studies, many of our reactions as an adult or how we are as an adult, comes from our inner child, comes from that base. That is why many people (including yours truly) when they start therapy, they do it for one reason, but end up discovering that many of their problems as an adult stem from our childhood.
I don’t want to go to deep in this, otherwise I will be writing for many days, but I would like to invite you to observe yourself and to think how you are now, and how you were as a child, what are the similarities and differences? Were you told to act a certain way? When did you learn or when did you hear for the first time that you needed to be certain way? Connect with this and maybe you will find a few answers you were looking for.
How do we connect with our inner child and why is it so important?
Our inner child is our most simple and true self. It is in this stage of our lives that we are innocent, we would dream and believe in good, nothing was impossible. As we grow, that started to change and we started to get a bit of “interference” with this connection with the true self. As I mentioned, a lot of our traumas might come from this stage in our lives, so it’s important to connect with this and to heal what needs to be healed and to let out what needs to be out. Our playfulness, our way to see things more simply and to enjoy the moment.
It’s common that as adults we feel a bit stuck in what we are doing. We are happy, but not completely content, there might be this sense of being a bit lost. It is in these moments we should ask ourselves, “what did I want to be when I grew up?” What was that answer to that hard question? Are you doing something similar? Can you start taking small steps to be more in contact with that?
Example: I always said I wanted to be a teacher, which I did. I went to uni and studied education, but for different reasons there was a time in my life I thought I wasn’t going to be a teacher, that it wasn’t for me. I went down a different path (into finance) which was fun and sometimes exciting, but I always felt there was something missing. And luckily for me, the universe brought me back into the teaching path, on the other side of the world, but it still counts!. And I must admit, I am pretty happy. I’m not in the traditional education system, but I must admit this suits me so much better, and little Pat jumps up and down every time she gets to help a little child. That story, I think is for another time 😉
Why is important to play? Scientifically speaking, play releases endorphins, which we all know is the hormone of happiness. Endorphins help us to reduce stress, pain and improve our sense of well-being. When we play, it’s easier to learn a new task, because we are relaxed and in a better mood. Play stimulates our imagination, helping us to improve our problem-solving skills and to adapt better to different situations. Also, by sharing a laugh and fun through play, it helps us to improve empathy, trust, and intimacy with others. Basically, it helps us to improve relationships and connections with others. Don’t you remember how easy it was to make a new friend while you were waiting with your mum to pay a bill or at an airport?
So… How do we do this? How do we connect with our inner child? I will share with you a few tips I have learned that you can do, daily, weekly, or monthly:
1.- Have a picture of yourself that brings a particular memory, it could be a family holiday or playing with a friend. Any picture of you that brings back a happy memory and look at it. Can you feel that happiness again? (I have mine on the wallpaper of my phone.)
2.- Have a date with your inner child: what was your favourite cartoon when you were a kid? Find it on YouTube and watch a few episodes whilst eating your favourite cereal from when you were a kid-my go to is the Flintstones and fruit loops!
3.- Swing. When you walk past a playground, take 2 minutes to sit on the swing and swing. I bet the rush of air will in your face will uplift your mood in a second.
4.- Play your favourite game. If you don’t have it, go, and buy some colouring pencils and books and just colour them. Or maybe get some clay, and just play with it. I bet your intuition, or your inner child will tap in and something beautiful will come out.
5.- If you notice there is pain in that stage of your life, write yourself a letter. You could write about forgiveness of how you didn’t know in that time, or you could tell that little you of all the things you have done so far.
6.- Learn. Maybe you are in a place where you could do with learning a little more about yourself and the world. Looking at some Eva Carlston Academy reviews could be a good start as somewhere where you can start to do this for example.
To summarise, connect with your inner child, connect with your essence, that playful side. It might be hard at the beginning, you might even think it’s silly, but I promise you, the more you play, the more you connect, the happier you will get with the grown up that you are now.
See you next time!
P.S: when you do your date with your inner child, don’t forget to tag us. Let’s fill social media with images of us enjoying being big kids!!!
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