Yes, we’re animal lovers – but we’re also fond of keeping all our limbs intact.
Let’s be honest: for most of us, “wilderness retreat” conjures visions of yoga mats, herbal tea, and maybe a self-discovery journal, not camouflage, rifles, and muddy boots. And yet, for a certain crowd (possibly including your uncle, your ex, or your surprisingly rugged best friend), hunting season is the highlight of the year.
Now, before you clutch your reusable tote in horror, let’s clarify: we’re not here to glorify animal slaying. Quite the opposite. We’re the type to name the squirrels and whisper motivational quotes to deer. But we also understand that some people choose to hunt — hopefully responsibly, ethically, and ideally without turning into a walking health hazard in the process.
So whether you’re a seasoned outdoorswoman, a curious tag-along, or just here to judge everyone’s gear choices with a soy flat white in hand, one thing’s universal: safety is sexy. Here’s what you need to know before setting foot in the wild.
1. Be Smart When Gearing Up (AKA: Look the Part Without Losing a Limb)
Hunting gear isn’t just about looking like you’re auditioning for a post-apocalyptic drama – it’s your first line of defence against discomfort, injury, and avoidable drama. Start with wearing high visibility clothing – that glorious blaze orange may clash with your autumn palette, but it’s better than becoming someone’s unfortunate “oops” story.
And let’s talk hearing. The walker razor helmet mount is a bit of genius – keeping your ears protected without sacrificing the ability to hear your friend sneaking snacks from their backpack. Good ear defenders block the bang, but still let you hear rustling bushes, whispered directions, or, you know, the occasional bear.
2. Firearm Safety: It’s Not Just a Vibe, It’s the Law
Firearms are not accessories – they’re serious business. Always treat them as if they’re loaded. Keep the muzzle pointed somewhere safe, like the ground or away from people you actually like. And keep your finger off the trigger until you’re absolutely sure you’re not aiming at someone’s dog, hiking partner, or a very unlucky tree stump.
If all of this makes you nervous – good. A healthy dose of fear means you’re taking it seriously. And if you’re not sure you remember the rules? Maybe skip the forest this year and rebook that safety course. Or opt for nature photography instead – the zoom lens is much less stressful.
3. Blaze Orange is the New Black
We’re repeating this for the people in the back: wearing high visibility clothing isn’t optional. It’s required. Especially on public hunting land where the only thing more common than misplaced bravado is poor aim.
Also, communicate. Let someone know where you’re headed and when you’ll be back. Check-in times aren’t just for worried mums – they’re basic common sense. Two-way radios, GPS apps, or even a good old-fashioned text can be lifesavers.
4. Weather: Nature’s Plot Twist in Four Acts
Sunshine at 7am, sleet by noon, mild existential crisis by 3pm. Classic British weather. Dress in layers, bring waterproofs, and pack snacks like your life depends on it – because at some point, it might. Hypothermia has no respect for your confidence or your North Face jacket.
And please, for the love of wellies, know where you’re going. Scout the area in advance, study a topographical map, or use a GPS app. No one wants to end up lost, hangry, and questioning all their life choices by mid-afternoon.
Final Thoughts (and Yes, We Still Like Animals)
Look, we get it – hunting isn’t for everyone. Some of us prefer to befriend the wildlife, not outwit it. But if you are heading out into the woods with a group of camo-clad adventurers (or just going along to “supervise”), you owe it to yourself – and every living creature in the forest – to be prepared, respectful, and above all, safe.
Because whether you’re stalking game, snapping photos, or simply in it for the snacks and stories, one thing’s for certain: coming back in one piece is always in season.
Life Lovers Magazine® 